letters to be sent
Dear fire alarm in my office that has been going off incessantly for the last two hours: Seriously, knock it the fuck off. I feel like there’s a gigantic mosquito in my head.
Dear Ipod: Please don’t die. I love you. You know I’m low tech. I don’t want to be forced to get some fancy new iPod that massages my hands, speaks four languages I don’t know, and knows how to satisfy a camel. You’re better than fine. But… you’re kind of falling down on the job right now. You freeze up for hours. I’ve needed to wipe you clean and start over twice; and there’s that creepy death rattle that comes out every now and then that’s getting more frequent. I’d really rather not have to replace you. I kind of dig that you’re old-school in that Mr. Do kind of way. So, please stay with me, I’ve always treated you well and I’m hopelessly devoted to you.
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