judge not…
Ask anyone who knows me well enough will tell you with amazing certainty that I have never judged them. It is not in my nature to decide right and wrong for others because I have a difficult enough time discerning it for my own life. Everyone has to walk their own path and I am in no position to comment on how they get there.
Perhaps it is the apprehension of being judged for my myriad of unmentionable acts that keeps me from casting a stone, or, I’d like to believe it is because I know it to be the right thing. People, in turn trust me with their secrets and I honor them as such — I’ve been privy to job theft, forgery, an illegal abortion, childhood sexual abuse, a high-level corporate exec had neither a graduate or undergrad degree (although his resume stated otherwise), and of course, any number of folks who were closeted, or had an addiction issue of some sort. It really doesn’t matter, I’m hardly the morality police and if you run into someone who thinks they are, you have to wondering what’s hiding under their bed.
At some point I realized that when we judge other people we actually judge ourselves. How we consider our environment is a clear reflection of our own personalities. And judgments are often times rooted in perception, not reality; they are a piece of how you see the world and not how it exists. When you look through a window you are obviously looking at something outside the window. But what if you consider the actual glass as your own perception?
When a judgment is made, there is an implied belief the behavior or trait being judged should be corrected. That is harmful — resentment and anger are typically the outcomes — not the expected change; and most of the time there is expectation of apology. Continue this, and what do you have? The psychological makings of shame, embarrassment, and any number of esteem issues.
No thanks. There’s enough of that in this world already.
